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I am still The Gourmand.
Here I am in 2025,
thrust out of a miserable retirement.
You haven’t heard from me for almost a decade,
my fellow Sri Lankans.
Not to worry, as much as the world has changed,
I have not.
I come from a long line of fat men thus,
I still live to eat like one.
That doesn’t mean I am unhealthy,
not all the time, far from it.
Nutritionally I eat very well, almost as an ode
to my fertile island of plenty.
I will soon demonstrate that further.
And when I indulge, I do so with gusto.
More on that in a long island minute.
Sri Lanka’s F & B providers, you have little to fear,
I am here to raise a glass for us all.
Bravo, on the surviving hospitality debilitating
years firmly behind us.
May we now rise in authenticity and represent
our great island on a plate.
Here’s where I stand, heading into the future:
BEWARE: INFLUENCERS
Some of you social media free-loaders and activist diners are lying to the public. Worse, the outrage of unqualified eaters are destroying small businesses. Be more responsible of I will expose your ignorance, culinarily.
WARNING: FAT CAT HOTELIERS
I really do love a couple of you big boys, especially the ones focusing on remote sustainability and celebrating local produce. The rest of you mainly know branding, you are failing on taste and misrepresenting our culture, culinarily.
BE ORIGINAL: CAFÉ CULTURE
I know you have it hardest, small businesses struggling with consistency, service and sky-rocketing costs. I will draw my public’s attention to individual greatness, per dish, maybe even sometimes, per restaurant, culinarily.
DANGER: CONFORMING COPYCATS
Colombo hotels and restaurants beware, standards are mediocre with rare exceptions to horrendous uniformity, culinarily.
SMILE: THE GREAT LITTLE GUYS
Roadside corn dealers, buffalo curd buggers, good old vade kades, I see you. Street food standards are horrendous, so I have a tri-lingual deal with my/this Publisher to further, coming soon, nutritionally.
I’ll be your trusted friend in the months and years ahead.
My Sri Lanka needs me to eat professionally.
LET US DINE.
R. PARKER PUBLISHING REPRESENTS THE GOURMAND.
WE SUPPORT HIS RIGHT TO FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION AND INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM, WHICH WE PUBLISH EXCLUSIVELY.
OUR LAWYERS ARE ON STAND BY. HE FEEDS THEM.
For more information on R.Parker Publishings
food branding, culinary concept management, and public relations
and media strategy in hospitality, please contact us directly.